I have another friend who, having ticked "no" to the papal infallibility question, received hate mail from a member who called her "unfit for the faith" and "living in a state of mortal sin." All because she doesn't believe the pope is infallible!
I'm sure that many Catholics would read this review and tell me that only good Catholics need apply and cafeteria Catholics aren't welcome. CM still allows divorced members to join--because they bring in money, I assume. They're too busy bashing members who ticked "no" on birth control or something.
In the forums, you regularly see people refer to other site members as a "5/7"--shorthand for a "bad Catholic," or a member who doesn't agree with the church's teachings on premarital sex or birth control.
(It rarely occurs to anyone that someone could be a "5/7" by disagreeing with the church's stance on not allowing priests to marry or papal infallibility--no, a "5/7" is always shorthand for a member who is promiscuous.) It's sad that a Catholic site promotes such judgmental attitudes on the part of its members.
In the past few months, I've seen the following things take place in the discussion boards and at the Institute: *One man mocked women who use birth control for medical disorders, implying that they are whores who use endometriosis as an excuse; *One man said that women who get breast cancer deserve it, because breast cancer is caused by delaying childbearing and/or using birth control pills; *Two men, on different occasions, said that narcissistic unmarried Catholic women will be at fault when ISIS takes over, because women's refusal to have a lot of children is enabling Muslim countries to "outbreed" us; *One non-Catholic person, who was on the site trying to figure out if she wanted to become Catholic, admitted that she didn't quite agree with the church's stance on birth control, and she was harassed out of the forums and ended up leaving the site (she wasn't even Catholic yet!
); *Several men have voiced concerns that women on the site are "too educated" and therefore not open to God's plans for women (because apparently God doesn't want women to be educated); *Men and women alike consistently blame feminism for why they aren't married yet and pine for the days when women didn’t work or college or "take jobs away" from men; *People continually make racist comments about Obama and misogynistic comments about Hillary Clinton’s physical appearance; *Some members have used very egregious hate speech against Muslims, which almost always goes undeleted/ignored by administrators; *One young man admitted to having violent impulses toward women and wrote that when he sees a young woman wearing skimpy clothes, he wants to punish her.
It would be nice if Catholic Match were like J-Date--a good and fun way to bring people of the same faith together.
The piece also made clear that if we expand our re-examination of sexual ethics without preserving the distinction between criminal acts and merely unattractive or immoral behavior, the #Me Too moment could easily founder on miscommunication and acrimony.Second of all, these questions are often more complex than a simple “yes” or “no” questionnaire allows (and contrary to CM belief, these questions are not self-evident dogma; they are constantly up for debate within the church itself).Third, and most importantly, by forcing people to divulge how they stand on personal issues, the site fosters intolerance among its members and sets up an "us vs. You’re either a good Catholic or a bad, flawed Catholic.As a Catholic site, it should make it a priority to ban hate speech and other dehumanizing sentiments.I’m sorry, but it’s not ever appropriate to say that a woman deserves breast cancer because she didn’t have children early enough, or because she used birth control pills.